I learned that my husband could have a pencil one moment and then have no idea where it went the next moment. I learned that we needed to have many pencils with us when we do a project together.

We really became true partners during these experiences together. As we worked together, we connected in ways that we wouldn’t have otherwise. I am so thankful for these experiences we got to have together.

We built several decks, we designed and finished parts of a basement, we did renovations to our first home, we built garden boxes, we built a shed and we have built a pavilion.

Construction is messy. It takes time to get the tools set up. It takes time to do the math to make sure you have the correct calculations before cutting your wood. Make sure to measure accurately before cutting that wood. We have made mistakes and learned this the hard way.

Cleaning up the tools and things at the end of the day when you are exhausted can be draining. Especially if you were working out in the hot sun. We had to take food breaks and drink lots of water to keep our bodies hydrated and fueled.

I love working on projects. I don’t love living in a renovation. That is never convenient. The whole time wishing for it to be done and over with to be able to enjoy the end result. To not have to be inconvenienced anymore. You know what I have come to realize? There is always another project to do.

Looking back at all of the projects, how sweaty and tired I was, how my muscles were sore from standing on concrete all day, or bracing myself on a ladder (remember I don’t like heights), or bending over again and again making my back ache, etc. I loved the time with my husband. The excitement of seeing the project come together.

As my kids grew up, we didn’t do quite so many projects, instead we did small renovations to our house. But, as they grew older, we did many things together as a family. They helped us build a big garden. It was a family experience we got to have together.

They helped us build a custom shed. Every step of the way, they were excited to hammer nails into wood and help screw things in. Hand tools up the ladder to us. Help clean tools up or throw everything under the canopy as a random rain cloud appeared overhead.

They got to help us drag the incredibly heavy wood for a pavilion we were about to build to the back yard from the driveway where it was dropped off. They got to see us problem solve when things didn’t go as planned.

During the pandemic, we built a huge pavilion in our backyard. It took a lot of work, patience and determination to get this pavilion built. My husband came up with the plans, he had to get them approved by the county we lived in. They sent him things he needed to modify and then he would send it back for approval.

Once everything was approved and the wood was about to be delivered, we had to dig the footers. These are the holes in the ground where the posts would be cemented into so that they would have a sturdy foundation and be able to support the roof.

Digging footers is a lot of work. My husband had this rusty old post hole digger that he uses with great determination and patience. He had to dig eight of these. they had to be about three feet deep and three feet wide.

Once they were dug, we had to call the county to come out and inspect each hole to make sure it was done correctly. They came out and do you know what the said? They told my husband that each hole was perfect, but they were about one foot too close to our neighbor’s yard. We needed to move them all over one foot before they would approve them.

My husband was devastated. He was exhausted. He felt like giving up. After getting the kids distracted with an activity, I went and found him sitting outside stuck in his thoughts. I listened to his frustration patiently and lovingly. He said he felt like just filling in the holes and not having a pavilion at all because it seemed like every step of the way, something kept happening that made it so much harder than it should have been.

Finally, I told him: Give yourself 15 more minutes to feel all of these feelings. Then, let’s get back to work. I gave him a loving squeeze and went back to the children to give him time alone. You know what? He didn’t take the full fifteen minutes. He was back at the holes and digging again within a few minutes. I am so proud of him.

He fixed the holes; the county came back out and approved them for building the pavilion. Now we could start placing the posts. These posts were big and heavy. There was a process to getting them level, then bracing them to keep them level, then getting the concrete prepared, pouring it in and then making sure that it was still level after we poured the concrete.

We worked as a team painstakingly for each post. It took all day. We finished just as dusk was setting in. We cleaned up and got showered and went to bed. The next day I drove up to the house and that very last post was not level. It was leaning noticeably.

We forgot in our excitement of being finished with this hard work, to make sure that it was level again after pouring in the concrete. The post had shifted, and we had no idea. I don’t remember my husband being stuck in his thoughts this time. I’m sure he was.

Instead, I found him out there with a sledgehammer breaking up the fresh concrete so that he could reset it. What determination he had. He could see the end result in his mind. This time, he knew it would be worth it to fix what was not right. He could see the great reward of having this project completed.

The pavilion is now up and has been such a blessing to our family. We can sit out there in the chilly weather, and we can sit out there in the hot of summer. We have sat out there during many rainstorms and just enjoyed the awesome power of nature.

It has been a place for our family to connect with each other and for friends to come and connect with us as well. I am so thankful for the gift that my husband has to create things. I loved being his tool girl and I have loved watching him teach my children how to make things and to work hard.

Life can be like this too. Sometimes, we feel as if life is under construction. Things are not going well even when we are putting in our best efforts. Take the time you need to feel all of the feelings. Then, get back to work. It will be worth it. I promise.