My husband started a new job and he had to leave us for four months, several states away, to go train for this new career field. Things started off fine. I was up to the challenge of being a “single” parent for a period of time. We made it through the first month and then we had plans to meet up at a friend’s house for a weekend reunion. I was to drive to a relative’s house for one night and then travel on to this friend’s house.

My son and I went off together on a road trip adventure. We got to our relative’s house, ate dinner and then I went to give him his nightly bath before bed. As I was taking his shirt off, his arm fell limply at his side. Finding this odd, I looked at his face and saw all of his color drained and his eyes rolling up in his head. I called for help as I carefully laid him on the floor.

My sweet sister-in-law drove us to the nearest hospital to see what was happening with my little guy. As soon as we got there, I felt as if I was going to pass out. I felt dizzy, weak, and hot. I had experienced this sensation before, but never had a name for it. As I struggled through these sensations, I remember thinking, “Not now! I need to be ok for my son…”

Eventually it passed and I was able to rest in the hospital bed holding my little guy. They decided that he had a fibral seizure. I wasn’t really convinced with their diagnosis, since he never got a fever. I didn’t really sleep well that night. The next day we were to travel on to our friend’s house where we would meet up with my husband.

I remember that we were on this very complex freeway system, and I looked up into my rearview mirror and saw my son looking very pale and staring off in the distance. I called his name, and he didn’t respond. I remember the panic as I tried to stay in my lane on the road as we were up on an overpass with curves, calling out to my little guy. Finally, he looked at me in the rearview mirror and I was able to realize that he was fine, just exhausted like me. I know that there were angels around our car keeping us safe while I was very distracted from my driving.

This experience almost broke me. This was a time before Skype, Zoom, and Facetime. I couldn’t see my partner to give me the reassurance, strength and support that I so desperately needed. We got to see him for a short weekend, but I was shaken in my ability to do this alone.

Once back home from this trip, I still had three months to go before my husband would be home again. Things started out find again. Then I had a situation happen at the grocery store. I was just finishing checking out when I felt dizzy and like I was about to pass out. I went to a nearby bench and was trying to figure out if I was going to stay conscious or not. What if I passed out and woke up to find my son missing?

I then heard a woman’s voice ask, “Are you alright?” I looked up and saw the kind face of a woman. I told her that I felt really dizzy and was worried I might pass out. She stayed with me until I felt a little better. She offered to help me get to my car, load the groceries and get my son into his car seat. She suggested that maybe I call a friend to have them help drive me home. She waited patiently there the entire time until my friend came making pleasant conversation with me. I’ll never forget this woman. She was an angel on earth sent to me that day from Heavenly Father.

I went to the doctor, and they gave me an antibiotic to help with a possible sinus infection. Well, I didn’t have a sinus infection. For some reason, the medication gave me great discomfort and eventually horrible dreams that felt like hallucinations. It was a really long night.

Those dreams felt so real. After experiencing several disturbing dreams, I dreamt that my husband had come home. He was in the doorway of our bedroom and saw me curled up in discomfort on the bed. He came and embraced me. It felt so real. That hug was such a physical presence. I now know that it was God sending me His love in such a trying time.

I woke up the next morning and decided that I was never taking that particular medicine again. I reached out to the doctor, and we talked about the things I was experiencing. She told me that I was experiencing anxiety. She told me that medication and therapy could be very helpful. I wasn’t enthused about either of those options.

During this time, one of my brothers reached out to me to see how I was doing. I was honest with him and told him of my struggles. This sweet brother of mine called me every day for many months past the time of my husband returning. He was my angel on earth at this time. He could empathize with my struggles. He was my rock during this trial of life. I’ll always love him for his tender words and patient care for me at one of the weakest and loneliest times of my life.

Sometime after my husband came home, I decided that it was time to start medication and therapy. I found help for both and I began a journey of understanding and healing. I’m so grateful that we have the science and ability to manufacture medications that can help alleviate so many discomforts of the mind and body.

Therapy was like going to school. My therapist taught me about anxiety. He helped me to find coping skills that work for me. It was a wonderful experience and it helped me greatly. It was not easy to go. It is not always easy to ask for help. I know this.

After several months of therapy and figuring out the correct dosage of medication, I followed up with my doctor. I told her of my progress, and I was feeling so much better. She listened intently with a smile on her face. Then, she asked a very unexpected question. She said, “Can I hug you?” I was a little surprised. I love hugs, so I jumped up to hug this woman that had helped get me on a path to recovery. A path that helped me to thrive in life again.

I asked her why she wanted to hug me. She responded, “Not a lot of people will do what you did. It is so much work. But you did the work, and I can see how much happier you are now. Thank you.”

I reflect on this encounter often. It isn’t normal for a doctor to hug a patient. But I will tell you this, that encouragement was more important to me than any prescription she could have written. She was another angel on earth for me at this time.