I came home and asked God why He abandoned me. I immediately was shown all of the ways that he didn’t abandon me. He gave me the strength and courage to endure what came next. The hard words. The relationship destroyed. The worry. The grief. All of it. He did not abandon me. I’m so grateful that He showed me that. It gave me the strength over the next several years to remember that each time things got hard regarding this situation.

It reminds me of the crucifixion of Jesus Christ. “And at the ninth hour Jesus cried with a loud voice, saying Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani? Which is, being interpreted, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?” Mark 15: 34 KJV

In the Garden of Gethsemane, he felt the pain, suffering, sadness, and sin for all of us. Every person that has and will ever live on this earth. And then, at the most painful and difficult time of His trial, even just before His death, He felt as if God had abandoned Him.

He felt ALL that we feel. Even the loss of God.

Sometimes, we feel so alone in the darkness surrounding us that we can no longer feel the presence of God. Remember the clouds. They are so big and thick, that we forget that the sun is still shining above them. It is not gone. God is still there.

Whenever you feel as though no one can understand what you are going through. There are two perfect beings that do. Jesus Christ, who literally felt all that you are experiencing. And Heavenly Father. He sends angels to you. Angels were there that day while Christ was crucified. They are there with you in the darkness. He sends angels on earth to attend you. Try to notice those acts for what they are.

Not long after this really hard conversation happened, even harder things happened within our family. Really hard things. This was such a difficult time. God sent so many angels to us at this time.

One beautiful woman came to our home with a bouquet of flowers. She told me that she didn’t know why, but she needed to bring them to me. I knew that God had sent her. He wanted me to know that He is very aware of me. He wanted me to feel His love. I’m so grateful to this woman who not only heard Him, but she listened. That is a special gift to me.

Another amazing woman surprised us with dinner. We did not need the dinner, but I knew again, Heavenly Father sent her to us. I don’t really think that any of these wonderful women even knew of what had happened. But they were inspired to act, and they did. I’m so thankful for these angels on earth sent to me.