The Pandemic was hard. For a lot of people. Such loneliness. Such division over a simple thing like a mask. Over “social distancing”. Our family has special needs. Children that don’t understand how to be safe around an invisible virus. Our youngest child has epilepsy and has really big seizures that have lasted upwards of thirteen minutes. We understood why we needed to “flatten the curve” and we social distanced for a really long time after seemingly everyone else went back to normal life. It was hard. Really hard.

We suffered through some mental health problems during this time. Just as many people in the world suffered. There were a few things I felt inspired to do that helped us. That is for another post. Today I really feel inspired to share this one…

During the Pandemic, a documentary called The Social Dilemma came out on Netflix. It was compiled of a bunch of “tech experts from Silicon Valley sounding the alarm on the dangerous impacts of social networking because of Big Tech uses in an attempt to manipulate and influence.” This documentary explains that these social media companies know that people are addicted to their social media. They use an algorithm that is designed so that when you watch something, the algorithm sends you more of that content to keep you on your phone longer and longer. Soon, you have lost much of your time to these apps. You become addicted. You reach for your phone without thought.  There are other things that this documentary talks about, but this is what stuck with me the most.

After watching it, I of course decided that I wasn’t addicted to my social media. Over the next few days, I was very cognizant of how many times I reached for my phone and specifically my social media apps without thinking about it. I was shocked. I couldn’t believe it. I decided immediately to take a break and deleted my social media apps. It didn’t take long for me to see how much brighter the world looked on a daily basis. There had been so many voices in dissention of so many things. The world was hurting and isolated and just in a dark place. My soul needed that break. I saw just how easy it was to stay in a negative mindset during this time. Most especially during the trial of enduring the Pandemic when I was just being fed negativity. I couldn’t see it while I was scrolling but it was very clear to me when I stopped.

For a while, everything went great. Then I started to realize that because of not having my social networking, I was not getting certain information that I deemed important. Information from my neighborhood FB group, my church FB group, etc. I wasn’t able to connect with friends as I had become so used to doing with the help of the social media apps that I had deleted. I needed to figure out how to connect, but not be sucked down into negative places again. It wasn’t long before I tried Instagram. I was very late to the game, but I got on there. It is not as easy to figure out for me as Facebook is. It definitely seemed more positive, but after watching The Social Dilemma, I also knew that whatever I decided to watch, that type of content would be sent to me through the algorithms.  I have pondered over this constantly. The algorithm is meant to send me content that I like. How can I turn this into a positive and productive thing?

I spent lots of months trying to figure out how to use this without becoming addicted again. I would do really well, then I would get stuck again. I don’t remember exactly when, but I do remember it was during an incredibly difficult time in life. I started giving a heart or saving posts from church leaders that shared conference quotes or uplifting testimonies from people that share scripture on Instagram. I wasn’t being intentional at this time. I was just drowning in the trials of life and looking for a source of light to keep me going. But soon, gone were all the celebrity posts and other such distractions, and my social media feed was full of spiritual fruit. Something that would feed my soul and give me exactly what I needed to go and tackle the difficult things of the day.

I unintentionally tricked the algorithm! Once I realized this, I was elated. I had been doing so much better in the really hard moments of the day when typical my patience would be spent, and I wouldn’t be able to show up the way I wanted to. I didn’t want to lose this. Over time I realized that anything time I stopped to look at or click on something other than the things that I had chosen to bring me light, my algorithm would change. Sometimes, it took great effort and time to get it back.

I’ve pondered on that. It is like losing the spirit of God. I want the spirit to be my companion. Sometimes, making wrong choices leads to loss of the spirit. Sometimes it is easy to get it back. Sometimes it takes great effort. When the spirit is gone, it feels like those days of scrolling through darkness on my Facebook account. I just feel heavy and gray. That is what the loss of the spirit feels like to me.

Now I try to be very intentional with my social media use. I use my Facebook account to keep connected with friends and to be able to get information that is necessary, but I use my Instagram to fill my spiritual cup. Don’t get me wrong, I also do Come Follow Me, a curriculum that the church I am a member of uses to study the teachings of Jesus Christ. I pray and do scripture study. I read or listen conference talks, and podcasts that invite the spirit to be felt and inspire me in ways that I need to be inspired. Inspired in ways that really matter.

Some people can just open the scriptures after praying for answers and they find them. I’m am so grateful that now I can also pray before opening Instagram and immediately my feed is filled with a quote or a video of something that is an answer to the prayer I just uttered.

While I know that the internet is huge blessing, it also is a place where Satan, the Destroyer loves to be. Be intentional in your social media use. Trick your algorithm. It’ll change your life. It will bring the light to you. Sometimes you will be tempted to stray and watch a video of something else. Don’t forget to get your algorithm back on track. If you go too long, you will feel it. It will take much more effort to get the algorithm back to where you want it to be. I promise you; it’ll be worth it.